The small things in life

One silly incident that just happened this evening, brought home to me, AGAIN, that the one person in my entire half century of life, who always had me at the forefront of his thoughts, who (in his own words) said "I think of you in all my wishes, even when I'm doing dishes", is not around now, and because of that, I am no longer the first, second, or even LAST thought in someones mind every day. And it hit me SO hard that I just sat and cried my eyes out for a good ten minutes. And as I type this, I am still crying. Isn't it strange, and wonderful, that it is the small things in life that really mean the most in the end, not the grand gestures. And Ken, every single day, in both big and small ways, showed me that I was really the centre of his life. AND I SO MISS THAT!! And I also realised that, for me at least, it is actually easier to be on my own, rather than with family, because then I do not get constantly hit with this realisation. You kinda think when you have your family around you that they at least should think of you sometimes (and more so because I do have them in my thoughts every day)... but the reality is that they have their own lives and concerns and worries and headaches, and you are not part of their thoughts. Fact of life. Get used to it. Yes, I will. Eventually I will develop a thick enough skin to not get affected like this. Eventually.